The Secret to Effective Networking: It’s Not About You

By Res Nova Law Firm

As a business owner, networking may be a necessary evil. You have to get your name out there by meeting other people, but does it have to be so uncomfortable? Making small talk and figuring out how to promote yourself and your business without sounding cringy is challenging for most of us. 

If you’ve felt this way before, you’re not alone. A recent Forbes article discusses the discomfort in the American networking style and contrasts the American way with how Italians network. The American approach to networking often seems forced and self-serving. However, the Italians network in a way that allows business connections to form naturally, based on genuine relationships and a desire to help others, which is easier and more satisfying. So, let’s explore how you can promote your business by networking more effectively with a few strategies from our friends across the Atlantic. 

The Problem with American-Style Networking

You’ve probably been there. You walk into a crowded room, name tag slapped on your chest, and immediately feel the pressure to “work the room.” Everyone around you is on a mission to collect as many business cards as possible, and it feels superficial or like a waste of time.

But here’s the thing: this approach rarely leads to meaningful connections. You might walk away with a stack of cards, but how many people will you remember? And more importantly, how many of them will remember you?

The American style of networking often focuses on quantity over quality. You’re taught to elevator pitch through conversations, always looking for what others can do for you. It’s exhausting, and frankly, it doesn’t work as well as you might hope. 

The Italian Approach: Building Relationships, Not Contact Lists

Now, picture this: You’re at a small café in Italy. You strike up a conversation with the owner about the local olive harvest. Before you know it, he’s introducing you to his cousin, who runs an import-export business. You’re not trying to network – just having a pleasant conversation. Yet somehow, you’ve made a valuable business connection.

This is the essence of Italian-style networking. It’s not about collecting contacts; it’s about building relationships. Italians don’t see networking as a separate business activity. Instead, it’s woven into the fabric of daily life. They help others because it’s the right thing to do, not because they expect something in return.

The phrase “I’ve got a guy” is common in Italy. Need a plumber? Your neighbor has one. Looking for the best local wine? The shopkeeper has one. This network of personal recommendations is built on trust and genuine connections. And guess what? It’s incredibly effective for business, too.

How to Network Effectively 

How can you bring this Italian flair to your networking efforts? Here are some key strategies to keep in mind:

Focus on Giving, Not Getting. The next time you’re in a networking situation, flip the script. Instead of thinking about what others can do for you, ask yourself how you can help them. You may know someone who’d be perfect for their project, or you have experience that could solve a problem they’re facing.

Offer Something of Value, Deliver it, Then Follow Up. In the same vein, offer something of value to someone else. Then, deliver the thing of value immediately and follow up after. The value should be related to your business or your services and could be a free book, report, or service. Then, once you’ve delivered the valuable offer, continue to add value until they are ready to take the following steps. One example may be including them on your house list and sending a weekly email newsletter. But make sure your newsletter is chock-full of exciting and valuable content people want to read!

By focusing on giving value first, you create a positive impression. People remember those who helped them and are likely to return the favor. Plus, it just feels good to help others!

Take Your Time and Build Genuine Connections. In the Italian approach, relationships aren’t built in a single conversation. Take the time to get to know people beyond their job titles. Ask about their interests, their families, and their dreams. Share your own stories and experiences.

This doesn’t mean you must become best friends with everyone you meet. But by showing genuine interest in others as people, not just potential business contacts, you create more profound, meaningful connections. These are the relationships that lead to long-term business opportunities and partnerships.

Expand Your Network Organically. Instead of limiting your networking to formal business events, look for opportunities to connect with people in everyday situations. Join a local sports league, volunteer for a community project, or become a regular at your neighborhood café.

As you build relationships in these settings, you’ll naturally expand your network. And because these connections are based on shared interests or experiences, they’re often more substantial and genuine than those formed at traditional networking events.

The Long-Term Benefits of Effective Networking

Adopting this approach might feel slow at first. You won’t walk away from every interaction with a new client or business deal. But over time, you’ll build a network of people who know, like, and trust you. And that’s incredibly valuable in business.

Think about it: when you need a service or product, who will you choose? A company you found through a Google search or one recommended by a friend you trust? Effective networking puts you in the position to be that trusted recommendation.

Moreover, this style of networking is more sustainable and enjoyable. You’re not constantly “on,” trying to sell yourself. Instead, you’re building authentic relationships and helping others. It’s a more natural and less stressful way to grow your business connections.

So, it’s time to ditch the aggressive, self-serving approach to networking. Instead, take a page from the Italian playbook. Focus on building genuine relationships, helping others without expecting immediate return, and letting your network grow organically. You might collect fewer business cards, but you’ll create something far more valuable: a network of people who want to see you succeed.

The Advisor You Need When You’re Ready to Build Your Business

As your Business Advisor, I know your marketing and networking strategies are crucial to your business success. I also understand that when you’re trying to build a business, you may be so busy networking that you neglect the other important parts of your business, like your essential legal, insurance, financial, and tax systems. But without these systems, your business can suffer, making your networking efforts fruitless.

That’s why I offer a comprehensive Business Breakthrough session. In this Session, we’ll analyze your current business foundations and develop a plan to address gaps. Together, we’ll ensure that your business is built on a solid foundation so you’re free to do what you do best—focus on growing your business.

Contact us today!

Res Nova Law